Oh, Send Our Regards

Oh, Send our Regards is a song written in the wake of the massacre at Lannisport. It was rather popular among Westermen, though the Ironmen eventually took to singing their own creation over the lyrics whenever they heard the tune. As such, the song has rather different words depending on who is playing it and where, and both kingdoms do not take kindly to hearing the other rendition.

Westerman
"Oh, send our regards to the butchers of Lann, Who murder sweet innocents down to a man. Beware of the sea, and the black deeps and murk. Beware of the cravens, beware where they lurk.

''Oh, send our regrets to the scum of the pond. What man has deemed horrid, they've gone far beyond. When rapists and thieves, pollute the mainlands. We give them a chop, they lose more than their hands.''

''Oh, swear our revenge to the orphans been made, Where mother's milk was, they suckle on hate. The cities and ports, they've been turned to soot. The rot we'll dig out, from branches to root.''

''Oh, send them a notice, we're soon to arrive, Though a guest of a savage's unlike to survive. The unwashed barbarian sits in a cave. He strangles a milkmaid and thinks himself brave.''

''Oh, sing them our song with a fresh pair of lungs, While making them eunuchs and cutting out tongues. Every dog has its day, though the squids slobber more. Let them come for another, we'll even the score."''

Ironborn
"Oh, send our regards to the sweet Lord of Lann. Short-cocked and one-balled, don't count him a man. A woman he asked for, but chased after whores. Leaving his manhood all covered in sores.

''Oh, send our farewell to the Lords of the West, Someone take a torch to the caves they infest. Spare not a tear for these victims of slaughters, While they pleasured themselves, we pleasured their daughters.''

''Oh, ask us for pay for the damage we did, We'll mail you a copper for each headless kid. We rushed to do battle, but can make accords. If in turn you pay us for the dents in our swords.''

''Oh, send our regrets to the young Greyjoy girl. Excited for wedding that pussy-cat churl. He bites back his words, for whore's maidenheads. Though try as he might, he breaks only beds.''

''Oh, send out the word and we'll come through again. And find Lannister dead at the end of Red Rain. His mother would weep, though most eyes are dry. Just like a woman when he's in her thighs."''